Metallman's Heavy Metal Rankings (NFL - Week 5)

Hey there friends. Welcome to the first edition of Metallman's Heavy Metal, my NFL power rankings. This will give me chance to give my thoughts on each NFL team and where I believe they stand in grand scheme of things. So let's get to it.

Heavy Metal


Rank - Team - Record - Previous - High/Low


#1 New York Giants (4-0) N/A N/A

What Super Bowl hangover? The G-men are looking strong and kicking ass. With the exception of Washington, the Giants have been served some pantsy ass teams the beginning of their schedule (Wins against Rams, Bengals, and the ailing Seahawks). They'll get two more cupcake games agains the Browns and 49ners before we really find out what this team is made of (week 8-11, @PIT, DAL, @PHI, BAL) Week 6 @ CLE

#2 Washington Redskins (4-1) N/A N/A

The Skins are looking impressive under young QB Cambell, a surging Clinton Portis (145 yrds and a TD) and a defense that is holding it's own, with a strong goal line stance against Philly this week. The Skins have quality wins over Dallas and Philly, and their only loss comes from a tough Giants team. Look for the team to go 6-1 before being tested by a tough Steelers team. Week 6 STL

#3 Tennessee Titans (5-0) N/A N/A

Big, big win against the Baltimore defense this week. Despite the Ravens having top ranks in defensive pass, rush, and total yrds/game, the Titans hold the top defensive spot in total points allowed/game (11.2/game). They held the Ravens to 10 pts and needed a 4th qtr rally to come back and win the game on 80 yard TD drive. Despite the Titan RBs having 47 total rushing yards, QB Collins kept a cool head and managed to pull out the victory against the Ravens. They have a potential trap game against the Chiefs next week, before hosting divisional rival, Colts. Week 6 @ KC

#4 Dallas Cowboys (4-1) N/A N/A

Tough lost for the Boys against the Skins last week, and they almost fell victims to a desperate Cincy team. After going up big on the Bengals, the Dallas defense decided to take it easy and allow QB Carson Palmer to fight back and come up big with get the Bengals within 1. With minutes to go, Dallas QB Romo led his team into the Red Zone, only to have his pass deflected and fall into the arms of Dallas WR Crayton.If not for that catch, Dallas would have settled for 3, giving Cincy one more shot at winning the game. Week 6 @ ARI

#5 Pittsburg Steelers (4-1) N/A N/A

The Pittsburg defense is keeping the team afloat. The defense ranks in the top 5 in all defensive rankings and as long as they keep them in the game, Big Ben has a chance to take them over the top, as demonstrated in the final 2 minutes of the game against the Jags. Big Ben looked like a rag doll, being sacked 3 times and hit many more than that. Steelers had no business winning this game since the Jags definitely played better. The BYE should serve this team, and especially Ben, a chance to recover and recoperate. Week 6 BYE

# 6 Carolina Panthers (4-1) N/A N/A

The lowly Chiefs didn't have a chance against this superb defense. Kansas QB Huard, and then QB Thigpen, were just beatened down like a dirty rug. Huard threw 2 INTs and between the Kansas QBs, sacked 3 times and just barely surpassed the century mark in passing yards (113 yards combined). On the Panther's side, RB DeAngleo Williams ran wild against the atrocious Kansas defense, running for 123 yrds (2 TDs) and caught a pass for 25 yrds (1 TD). The man was a beast for us fantasy players. Let's see if they can keep it up next week against a non cupcake defense in Tampa Bay. Week 6 @ TB

#7 Denver Broncos (4-1) N/A N/A

How the hell does this Denver team keep winning? Their defense ranks 26th or lower on the 4 major defensive ranks and yet, they're sitting atop the AFC West. The answer? QB Jay Cutler, that's how. If he plays well, the team will win. Simple as that. On his one bad game, against the Chiefs, he was not able to bring the team back from RB Larry Johnson's dismantling of the Denver defense, becasue he was watching the game on the side lines. Even against a good TB defense, Cutler managed to bring his team back from a bad game to squeeze out the victory. Week 6 JAC

#8 Chicago Bears (3-2) N/A N/A

Just what the Bears QB Kyle Orton needed, the bottom dwellers of the NFL to showcase his talent. Orton threw for a career high 334 yrds, and added 2 TDs in thier win against the Detroit Lions. That is not to say that the Bears defense didn't do their thing. They sacked the Lions QBs 4 times, forced a fumble, intercepted QB Orlovsky (familiarize yourself with the name, friends. If QB Kitna continues his horrible play, we'll be hearing Orlovsky more often) for a TD. Week 6 @ ATL

#9 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-2) N/A N/A

Tough loss for the Bucs to swallow this week, knowing that they had thier chance to put away the Broncos but the Bucs QBs just could not get it done. QB Brian Greiese was knocked out the game by his former team in the third qtr, and QB Jeff Garcia faired slightly better, tossing a TD and an INT. I dont know if they wanted to win this game in the air but with RB Warrick Dunn and RB Earnest Graham averaging 6 yrds/rush, why would you abandon the running game. Jon Gruden lost this game for the Bucs. You don't abandon the one part of the game that is actually working for you. Week 6 CAR

#10 Buffalo Bills (4-1) N/A N/A

QB Trent Edwards was knocked out of the game (concussion) and so was the Bills offense. Edwards was kocked out in the 1st qtr and his replacement, QB J.P Losman was not able to sync up with the offense. Thier only highlight being a 87 yrd pass to Lee Evans for a TD. After that, it was all QB Kurt Warner and crew. Warner threw for 250 yrds and 2 TDs, the defense forced 1 INT, 3 fumbles, 5 sacks, and RBs James and Hightower rammed in the end zone for a combined 3 TDs. QB Edwards is the heart and soul of this team and luckily for the Bills, the bye week is coming up. Week 6 BYE


Soft Rocks

#11 New England Patriots (3-1) N/A N/A

QB Cassel is managing the game, a la QB Rex Grossman, but the New England defense is keeping this team alive in the AFC East. Week 6 @SD

#12 Indianopolis Colts (2-2) N/A N/A

QB Peyton Manning and company have not found that chemistry on offense. This team can very well be 0-4 if not for some lucky breaks and Manning heroics. Week 6 BAL

#13 Minnesota Vikings (2-3) N/A N/A

On a night where the Minnesota RB Adrian Peterson was held in check by a Saints defense, the Minnesota Vikings secured a win due Saints K Gramatica missing a field goal with 2 mins to go. His second missed kicked in the final minutes of a game. Week 6 DET

#14 Arizona Cardinals (3-2) N/A N/A

Cards QB Kurt Warner has been erractic these past 2 weeks. Looking like the old man that he is last week against the Jets, and like the MVP that he once was this week against th Bills. The MVP needs to show up against a tough Dallas squad if they plan on winning. Week 6 DAL

#15 Atlanta Falcons (3-2) N/A N/A

Big win against Green Bay this week. Atlanta RB Michael Turner cut up the Green Bay defense for 121 yrds and TD and QB Matt Ryan soared with 194 yrds, 2 TDs and an INT. Week 6 CHI

#16 San Diego Chargers (2-3) N/A N/A

The Bolts were the latest victim of the surging Dolphins. Despite the Chargers having the worst pass defense in the NFL, the Dolphins beat them in the ground game (167 yrds rushing). Week 6 NE

#17 Miami Dolphins (2-2) N/A N/A

Is this a college team or a professional football team? With the success of the "Wild Cat" formation paying dividends, don't be surprised if this team brings back the statue of liberty play. Week 6 @ HOU

#18 Philidelphia Eagles (2-3) N/A N/A

Big loss against their division rival, Washington, this week. Issues at the goal line has lost 2 games for the Eagles. Philly RB, Brian Westbrook, broke 2 ribs in this game. He finished the game, but you have to wonder how that is going to affect this team. Week 6 @ SF

#19 Green Bay Packers (2-3) N/A N/A

Green Bay QB Aaron Rodgers put on his best Brett Favre impersonation and went on and started the game, despite having an injured shoulder. Despite his 313 passing yrds and 3 TDs, Atlanta QB Matt Ryan and RB Micheal Turner proved to be too much for his Green Bay defense. Week 6 @ SEA

#20 Baltimore Ravens (2-2) N/A N/A

In a defensive match up with the Titans, Titan QB Kerry Collins was able to do something Ravens QB Joe Flacco couldn't... Pass for a TD. Week 6 @ IND

#21 New York Jets (2-2) N/A N/A

We all know that number 4 was watching that Green Bay game, laughing at Aaron Rodgers on the brink of losing his consecutive start streak at 4. Week 6 CIN


Pile of Crap

#22 Jacsonville Jaguars (2-3) N/A N/A

Would of, should of, could of... That's what the Jags will be thinking when watching the game film. Jags defenders were all over Big Ben, but they just were not able to bring him down when the game was on line. Week 6 @ DEN

#23 New Orleans Saints (2-3) N/A N/A

It was the Reggie Bush show on Monday night prime television. Reggie runs back 2 punt returns for TDs to etch his name in the record books. However, it wasn't enough to cap the win against the Vikings. K Gramatica's missed field goal sealed thier fate in the final minutes of the game. Week 6 OAK

#24 San Francisco 49ners (2-3) N/A N/A

San Francisco's QB O'Sullivan threw for 3 TDs against the Patriots!! But he also threw 3 INT and only had 130 yrds in the air. Week 6 PHI

#25 Seattle Seahawks (1-3) N/A N/A

The Seahawks welcomed WR Bobby Engram back from his shoulder injury. However, it didn't do much good against the Giants since he only averaged 7.6 yrds per catch. Week 6 GB

#26 Oakland Raiders (1-3) N/A N/A

New coach, new mantra, new team? Stay tuned for the next edition of The Pirates of Oakland and find out where the drama takes us next. Week 6 @ NO

#27 Cleveland Browns (1-3) N/A N/A

Does head coach Romeo Crennel care about his job? If so, insert Cleveland QB Brady Quinn now!!! Week 6 NYG

#28 Kansas City Chiefs (1-3) N/A N/A

At least the nightmare is over for the Kansas City offense after being blanked by the Panthers. Oh wait... The Titans are coming to town. D'Oh!!!! Week 6 TEN

#29 Houston Texans (0-4) N/A N/A

What the hell was Houston QB Rosenfels thinking? He, trying to be the hero, coughed up the ball when Indy was on their heels, giving Manning a chance to win this game. Hey Rosenfels, you are not a hero. You're a zero, and coincidentaly, that's how many games your team won because of you. Week 6 MIA

#30 St. Louis Rams (0-4) N/A N/A

Coach Scott Linehan out, coach Jim Haslett in. If only if was that easy exchanging losses for wins. Week 6 @ WAS

#31 Cinncinati Bengals (0-4) N/A N/A

The Bungals of old has emerged and they just can't seem to get a break. Ocho Cinco is not helping his team by kissing stars. Week 6 @ NYJ

#32 Detroit Lions (0-4) N/A N/A

No more excuses Detroit. Matt Millen is out. Get your act together because you're degrading the value of the NFL. Week 6 @ MIN